I think my barber's gay.
No, he didn't knead my scalp in an untoward way as he gave me a haircut. It just sort of dawned on me today. They call him 'God-bless'. Everybody apart from me, that is. I call him 'good evening'.
I looked at his moustache and beard today and I think it kind of gave him away. A thinner-than- Hitler type hairbrush moustache which continued in a thin line beyond his lips down his chin. A sort of thin vertical line starting from right under his nose past his lips down to the neck area.
And then, his 2nd assistant, slim, almost thin, always in a string sleeveless vest with a flaming red skull tatooed on his left bicep and a 'Jesus is Lord' cross on his right arm.
And then the 1st Assistant who wasn't there today, kind of effiminate, I remembered.
Strange thing to strike me after more than a year of using this barber shop. The assistants have been there for less time, though.
Nigeria is officially a nation of homophobes. That's the government stance and that of its policies too even though we say one thing and do other things.
Still, you can accept our being confused. Up until a few years ago, the psychology text books said homosexuality was a mental illness, then came the official American mental health change (Nigerian psychologists still havent caught up), and then came 'Will and Grace' and 'The Ellen Degeneres' Show.
The 'Gay Lords' are bolder here now though. A couple of years ago, drove up behind this nice car and saw the legend on a bumper sticker, 'We're here, we're queer, so get used to it'. I rapidly drew up beside it to get a good look at the driver and he calmly looked back at me. So there.
The TV show host, Funmi Iyanda on her 'New Dawn' interviewed Alimi who came out of the closet on National TV. The Television Authorities complained vehemently to Funmi for her 'excesses'.
The Anglican Church Chieftain in Nigeria, Rev. Akinola fought the American Church to a standstill on the issue of ordaining Gay Ministers. He was bold in adhering to the commandments of the Bible and refusing the new move. Time Magazine acknowledged that he stuck to his guns.
But maybe it's time we caught up with the rest of the world. Maybe not.