Monday, December 18, 2006
Fame! Fame at last! The A-Z of Nigeria was culled from this blog and published by The Guardian on Sunday, December 17. (The publication stopped at the letter ‘J’ and it said ‘to be continued next week'). Now if I ‘disappear’, you’ll know it’s any one of the many people/organizations I referred to, that had me done away with.
10 things to do before I die.
Was passing in front of my TV a few days ago when this programme came on telling the 50 favourite things people wanted to do before they died. “This should be interesting”, I thought, and found a comfortable position to watch from.
Among the top 50 were desires to see the Great Wall of China, visit the extremes of Canada to watch Polar Bears, take a train ride on the Orient Express (I thought that was an Agatha Christie book) and take a trip to the Rockies. The topmost desire was to…wait for it….swim with dolphins.
‘Whose top 50?’, I wondered. What we have here is a problem of perspectives and now I see the reason some say I.Q. tests for people from different levels of national development should vary. Make no mistake, all men are born equal, (apart from Nigerians who are smarter than most).
But swim with dolphins? What for? They can tell if a person is pregnant? So?
It tells a lot about developed nations and systems that work, when people can have the luxury of 2nd mortgages on their homes so as to see the World Cup. (Supporters of the Republic of Ireland did this).
There are things my fellow countrymen would like to have before they die and seeing Polar Bears is not one of them. When we have the basics, maybe we can think of such things, then.
Here are 10 of the more pressing, in no particular order-
1) Have constant electricity. Not having to beg some drug-addled marauders dressed as Electricity Officials who climb up and down tangled electrified cables on poles, connecting and disconnecting power supply at will.
2) Own a car no matter how old. While waiting for the car wish to come true, have a transportation system that works, not molues driven by drivers high on shepen, paraga and so’ku d’aye* (*raise the dead: it’s an alcoholic beverage too)
3) Have a city where the policeman will not rob you at night or the LASTMA official by day. (i.e law enforcement agencies that work)
4) Have roads that are tarred and repaired properly.
5) Have heavy traffic intersections controlled by traffic lights, and not psychotic vagrants (lunatics), drug addicts, cripples, dwarves with bloodshot eyes and ex-area boys. (I’ve seen examples of all these)
6) Have a judiciary respected by the government.
7) Have a health care system that works.
8) Own one’s own home.
9) Be respected by those elected/selected to serve in government.
10) Eat 3 meals a day